


Wake Up

by StatueOfLuberty



Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: Coma, I can't wait until Sunday so I need to write this, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-06 21:10:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8769418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StatueOfLuberty/pseuds/StatueOfLuberty
Summary: There's just so much blood.





	

His ears are ringing. His hand is warm, but the rest of his body is cold. Kamilah is yelling while running towards them, but it sounds hollow and far away. Lukas' body is probably heavy against his, but the adrenaline running through his veins prevents him from feeling any weight.  _LukasLukasLukas_ is the only thing going through his mind right now. He doesn't even think about pulling them to safety, even though he's maybe a target himself.

" _Philip,_ we need to go," Kamilah says, trying to drag Philip away.

"I won't leave him!" Philip cries.

"I'm trying to get Lukas out of the water and to safety while we wait for an ambulance, but I can't do that if  _you don't let go_ ," she explains.

Together, they get Lukas behind the makeshift ramp. Kamilah tells him to keep pressure on the gunshot wound while she looks around to see if she can spot the shooter at all. Philip's chest feels empty as Lukas gets paler. It feels like hours pass before Helen pulls up in her Jeep, an ambulance behind her. Bo jumps out from the passenger side and rushes over, trying to push Philip away from Lukas, but Kamilah stops him.

"He's been keeping your son alive. Push him away, and it could go downhill very quickly," she tells him.

The paramedics appear with the gurney and tell Philip to keep the pressure on the wound when they realize he won't leave Lukas. It doesn't take long for them to transfer him to the gurney, and then they're rushing to the ambulance, hoping they can get there before the killer possibly tries to get another shot in.

"Why the hell does Philip get to go and I don't?" Bo questions.

"Did it look like Philip was willing to leave his side?" Helen asks. When he doesn't answer, she nods. "That's what I thought. Come on, I'll drive you to the hospital."

Meanwhile, Philip's watching the life drain from Lukas. There's just  _so much blood._ It's all over the floor of the ambulance, and it just. Won't. Stop. He feels like they're not going to make it to the hospital. There's no way they can. The nearest one's at least fifteen minutes away without traffic. This can't be the last memory he has of Lukas. He doesn't want his last memory to be of him  _dying._ He wants it to be of them kissing in the barn, or of them cuddling in Philip's old room, or even of them taking the Polaroid picture and listening to their playlist. He wants it to be anything but what happened in the past twenty minutes.

When they get to the hospital, a nurse takes over on applying pressure, leaving Philip alone in the hallway. He stares and stares until Helen and Bo find him. Helen has a bag of extra clothes for him and holds open the door to the nearest bathroom. He washes his hands at the sink, thankful for the sensors on the faucet, soap dispenser, and towel dispenser. While he changes, he notices that his hands are shaking. They're shaking really badly. He tries to stop them by crossing his arms, but it doesn't work. He wishes he could turn the sink on and just sit there, but he can't, so he leaves the bathroom and heads to the waiting room. Bo's pacing while Helen's on the phone, talking to Kamilah.

"He's in surgery now. They're saying it's not good," he hears her say. "There's no way we can keep this from the press. As soon as it's out there, the killer's going to come back."

"Helen," Philip chokes out.

Helen turns around, says something into the phone, and pockets it before heading over. She gathers him into a hug, stroking his hair as his body wracks with sobs. He doesn't know what else to do; his mom taught him what to do if she ever overdosed, and she showed him how to take care of a wound like a stab or a gunshot for whenever she went out to buy drugs, but she never told him how to cope with the possibility of anybody he loves being in the hospital. Then again, you can't teach that.

"Kamilah's on her way down. She wants to ask you a few questions," Helen tells him.

"What? Why?" Philip asks.

"It's just protocol. You're a witness."

"Why can't you do it?"

She cups his cheek and says, "We're family. I'll still be involved with the case, but I can't question you."

As if on instinct, she kisses his forehead and holds him. He surprisingly relaxes a little, suddenly so tired. His body aches from the amount of energy he's used. He just wants to lie down and rest for a little while.

_But Lukas._

* * *

 

Philip wakes up to Helen gently shaking his shoulder. He looks around, but she shakes her head. "Nothing yet. Kamilah's here, though."

"How long was I asleep?" he asks as he sits up.

"Not long. I wish I could let you sleep longer, but she needs to get the interview done," she tells him. "It shouldn't take long."

He nods and stands up, stretching his arms over his head. Kamilah takes him to a quieter part of the hospital and asks him to run through what happened, then think and try to remember if he saw anything. He tells her what he knows and speed-walks back to the waiting room. Taking his seat again, he lets out a big sigh. God, he feels like he could sleep forever. He doesn't want to, though. He wants to stay awake and wait for Lukas to get out of surgery. He wants to be the second one Lukas sees (Bo's obviously going to be the first). He wants to hold Lukas' hand and laugh at whatever joke Lukas tells. He wants to tell him he loves him.

It's hours before the doctor finally comes out. He tells them that Lukas isn't completely out of the woods, but he survived through the surgery. He's getting a blood transfusion right now, but Bo can go see him. Philip nods, that empty feeling in his chest back. He's had that feeling so many times when it comes to Lukas, mostly because of how Lukas treated him and whatever was going on between them.

_Not was. **Is.** What  **is** going on between you two. Don't think like that._

"Let's go back to the house, okay? Bo will call me when Lukas wakes up," Helen says.

Philip hesitates before nodding. They're silent all the way home.  _Home._ He's finally thinking of this place as his home, and it quickly went to hell. He and Lukas are finally on the same page, and it quickly went to hell. It's like he can't win. He gets taken away from his mom, from the city that he  _knows_ _,_ that he  _loves,_ and he's put in freakin' Tivoli, New York, where he meets this asshole that ends up being his only friend. He falls for his friend, falls  _hard,_ but he seems to be the only one that does. Then, they have a falling out, and just when they're okay, more than okay, his friend (boyfriend?) gets put into protective custody. They get permission to be by themselves for a little while, and it just—it  _went to hell._ Philip can't think of any other way to describe it.

When they get to the house, Philip goes to his old room and locks himself in there. He crawls into bed, grabs the pillow Lukas used, and holds it close. It still smells like him. God, he hopes Lukas ends up okay. He doesn't know what he'd do without him. Lukas is his only friend, honestly the only reason he stayed in Tivoli. Helen and Gabe are great, but he would have to leave if Lukas—

He needs to stop thinking like that.

_I can't help it. There's a chance that I'll wake up one morning and he won't._

* * *

 

Philip finally gets to see Lukas, but it's obvious Helen's not telling him something on the drive over. He wants to know, but he's also scared.

"Lukas hasn't woken up, yet," she blurts.

His heart sinks. Will he ever wake up? God, he hopes so. He needs to tell Lukas everything he feels. He wants him to know that he loves him, even if Lukas doesn't love him back.

"Kamilah's up there now, keeping watch. I'll be taking her place tonight. Right now, she's the only one I trust, so we're the only ones sitting outside his door," she explains. "He'll be safe."

Philip nods and heads inside, his heart racing. There's no need for his heart to race; Lukas hasn't woken up, yet. He's probably not going to wake up today. His body's trying to recover from losing so much blood and trying to heal, he might not wake up for a couple days.

Kamilah looks up and gives Philip a pity-filled smile. He tries to smile back, but it turns into a grimace. He then walks into the hospital room and just stares. Lukas looks so pale, so fragile, like a piece of paper. Bo's probably working on the farm, trying to keep himself distracted. There are four different bouquets in the room, probably from his friends. They canceled school for the day when news broke of what happened to him. Philip wouldn't have gone if they didn't; there's no way he would've been able to concentrate when there was chance Helen would pull him from class and tell him that Lukas was gone.

Philip sits on the edge of the bed, placing his hand over Lukas'. It's warm, but not like when he touches Philip while they kiss. His face is blank, free of the constant stress from seeing the killer everywhere. His hair is hanging over his forehead, so Philip pushes it to the side.

"Come on, Lukas," he whispers. "You need to wake up. I gotta tell you something important."

"Whatever it is, I'm pretty sure he knows."

Philip turns and stands, stepping away when he sees Rose in the doorway. "I can leave you two alone."

She waves it off. "I've been here all morning." She looks around before saying, "I know about you two."

"How?" is what comes out of his mouth instead of denial.

"He told me when we broke up. He actually told all our friends," she says.

"Why did he do that?" he asks.

She shrugs and says, "He said he was tired of hiding you; he wasn't scared of what everybody would think anymore."

Philip feels his mouth tug into a smile. "He really said that?"

Rose nods. "He really did. I'm gonna go, let you have some time with him, but I'll see you at school."

He takes his seat on the bed once she's gone, holding Lukas' hand again. The heart monitor is the only thing assuring him that Lukas is still alive, that he's still  _here._

"I love you, Lukas. Please wake up."

* * *

 

It's been almost a week since Lukas was shot. They haven't found the killer yet, but both Helen and Kamilah swear they're close. He went back to school when he realized that sitting at home with the sink running wasn't going to cut it. Rose and her friends have been nice to him, obviously trying to keep him distracted. Some people give him looks when they pass him in the hallway. He hears the whispers; he knows they're talking about how he's gay, how he turned Lukas gay, all that shit. He ignores it all because he's too scared to say something. He can't fight for shit.

He's in math class when his phone buzzes. He wants to check it, but he knows it's not Lukas. He returns to taking notes, hoping he'll understand this at some point. He's in the middle of copying the problem down when the door opens, and Helen pops her head in.

"Philip, grab your things," she says.

He does as told and meets her in the hallway, closing the door behind him. "What's going on?"

"He's awake," she states.

His heart races. Lukas is awake. Lukas is  _okay._ "Can we go see him?"

"I didn't tell you to grab your stuff for nothing," she says with a smile. "C'mon, let's go see your boy."

His mind is racing on the drive over. What's he going to say? He's scared to tell Lukas he loves him, now that he knows he's okay. He doesn't want to ruin this.

Philip takes the stairs, too impatient for the elevator. He's breathless by the time he reaches Lukas' room. Bo and Lukas look at him when he slides to stop, knocking into the door.

"Philip," Lukas breathes, a smile forming on his face.

Philip steps forward, pulling Lukas into a hug. Lukas holds on tight, kissing the side of his head. Philip pulls back in shock, afraid to look at Bo.

"Well, I guess that's my cue," Bo mutters, stepping outside.

Philip sits on the edge of the bed, taking Lukas' hand in his like he's done the past week. The only difference is that Lukas is holding just as tightly, a smile on his face.

"I can't believe you're awake," Philip whispers. "I was so scared."

"My dad told me you were here every day," Lukas states.

Philip nods. "I didn't want to be at home. I was kind of pathetic and slept in my old room. The bed smelled like you."

"Yeah, kind of pathetic, maybe a little creepy," Lukas says with a laugh. "I'm glad you're here."

"I am, too."

"Have they caught the killer?"

Philip hesitates before shaking his head. "They promise they're close, though. I'm pretty sure Helen hasn't slept all week."

"Have you?" Lukas questions.

"Why?"

"Because if it were you that was shot, there's no way I would've been able to sleep."

Philip suddenly blurts, "I love you," before covering his mouth, his eyes wide. Lukas stares at him, easily as surprised. The brunet averts his gaze, not knowing what to do. God, it's the worst possible timing. Lukas is probably high on pain medication, will probably laugh it off and forget it.

"Hey. Look at me."

He looks up and notices that Lukas looks alert. His eyes don't look like his mother's. They're clear and bright and definitely looking at him, pinning him to the spot. He's scared of what he's going to say. He doesn't want to hear that it was just hooking up or that he's made a mistake.

"My stomach hurts."

"I'll go get a nurse," Philip says as he stands up, but Lukas doesn't let go of his hand. Instead, he laughs.

"No, listen.  _My stomach hurts._ I love you so much that my. Stomach. Hurts." Lukas pulls him until he's sitting and their foreheads are pressed together. "I love you too."

Philip smiles and lets out a laugh in disbelief before pressing forward and kissing Lukas. Lukas smiles before kissing back, and everything's okay.


End file.
